What do you value?

Is there any point in stating our values?

I think there is. That is, if we’re going to take them seriously. 

When so many things are in flux values can be our rudder.

If we define our values well and use them to guide our decisions, we should be more satisfied with our actions and their outcomes. 

Accurately defining them is tricky, though. 

We’re not always honest with ourselves.

I’m starting an experiment. I’ve identified what I think I value and I’m going to try and use these values to guide my decisions.

What work do I want? What work do I want to avoid? 

Should I help my daughter with a problem or just stand back and let her figure it out on her own?

I thought about a separate list for work and life, but I don’t think I need one (remember blending?). 

What I value

1. Building relationships – supporting family, clients, colleagues, partners, etc. Learning from them and helping them learn. Listening to people and being heard.
2. Solving problems – finding order in chaos (whether it’s the chaos of work or the chaos of raising three teen-agers)!
3. Contributing – participating as much as I can.
4. Learning – about everything and anything. I love to learn through people. Interaction is critical for me!
5. Making decisions – picking a path, making progress, and adjusting as we go along.
6. Being current – knowing what’s going on now and what’s coming. Watching for things that could shake everyone up.
7. Being busy – I love action! Doing things!!
8. Experimenting – trying new things and seeing what sticks.
9. Figuring out what’s next and getting there – growth and change!

What are your personal values? 

Once you have an idea, consider this: Where do you think other people's values differ from yours and how do those differences impact how you each approach life or work? 

Managing change is largely about managing value conflict.

This isn’t just an idle exercise!

Comments

[Blaine Collins]

I like the way you express your values, Ann!

On other lists, many values (such as integrity or hardwork) seem almost to hollow to have real meaning. Fine values, of course, but vague.

Your list of values, on the other hand, are practical and action oriented. I think they will be very useful for you for guiding decisions.
Not an idle exercise indeed! Thanks for sharing.

[ann michael]

Hi Blaine!

Thanks for the comment (and the email telling me my comments weren't working!).

My theory is that as I evaluate decisions against these values, I'm probably going to have to adjust them. Not to mention, I think our values change over time.

I'll let you know how my little experiment goes in a month or so!

Ann

[Roger von Oech]

Very good list. It looks like you've done some hard thinking.
For me (as it may be true for you as well), the challenge is to prioritize my values, i.e., which value takes precedence over the others. For example, when I look at your list, I think experimenting is great (#8), but being busy (#7), being current (#6), and contributing (#3) would get in the way for me, and cause me to have less time for #9.

Thought-provoking.

[ann michael]

Roger -

That's a really interesting point. I was thinking almost the opposite - that experimenting leads to learning, being current, and figuring out what's next. Some of these are the results of others - like value multi-tasking!

But you're right - if you're very busy with "daily details" you have to make yourself build time in to explore or it won't happen. Thanks for making me look from a different angle!

Ann

[Valeria Maltoni]

Ann -
This is amazing; your list matches almost exactly mine. One of my promises for this year is to meet more like-minded people.

Finding you through Bob Sutton's blog fits perfectly with my values.

There is an excellent instrument called Birkman that is especially useful in figuring out how we operate under normal circumstances and where we go when stressed.

When we look at the picture of a team, we can really see where everyone is and goes -- and are able to adopt a common language to understand and communicate to each other about it.

The Birkman captures what you enjoy about an activity (our company measured business development), your usual style, your needs -- the motivation you need to develop the most effective style -- and your stress behavior when your needs are not met.

The instrument also shows the gap by areas of interest, overlapping those to the life style grid.

The exercise was an eye-opener for me in that it gave me very specific feedback on the areas in which I differ from my team mates -- and theirs to me -- and promoted a whole new sense of awareness. It was a tremendous learning opportunity. One much greater than a DISC (lite behavioral profile) or a Myers-Briggs (personality style?).

So, in my long-winded way, I do agree with you. Learning to appreciate the differences is not just an idle exercise. It is indeed enlightening.

- Valeria

[ann michael]

Valeria -

I just went over to the Birkman website. It really does look interesting.

Thanks for telling us about it!

Ann

[Andrew]

Interesting! Change is a constant thing, that's a fact. We need to undergo change to grow. This is one thing I teach at http://mlmtraining.org

[Andrew]

Interesting! Change is a constant thing, that's a fact. We need to undergo change to grow. This is one thing I teach at http://mlmtraining.org

[Andrew]

Interesting! Change is a constant thing, that's a fact. We need to undergo change to grow. This is one thing I teach at http://mlmtraining.org

[Andrew]

Interesting! Change is a constant thing, that's a fact. We need to undergo change to grow. This is one thing I teach at http://mlmtraining.org